I’ve received many a comment, message, or email regarding the danger of blogging about certain things a bit too much—some of my stories about work can be a bit revealing. Then again, they don’t exactly violate HIPPA or identify the people in question. I imagine the day they sit me down to talk about my blog going something like this:
“You have a blog and you blogged about us and it is bad, BAD.”
“Because you can’t tell people the truth—The world can’t know that we have no idea what the hell we’re doing.”
“Isn’t that a bigger problem…?”
I’m thinking I’ll just claim this is all fiction. I made it up, guys. Not true at all. My workplace is a beacon of compassion and ethical medical practices. I can’t get fired for chronicling these completely fabricated and unfounded fantasies, right? That being said… if I were to get canned for all of this… I suppose I wouldn’t feel compelled to keep the following (totally untrue, completely made up) stories to myself.
For the Last Four Years, We’ve Been Stealing Millions of Dollars!
Someone at a certain insurance department is not doing their job very well, let’s just say that. When they catch their accounting error we’ll put on a good show of “OMG! We had no idea! How crazy!” but inside we’ll be thinking “dammit, we’re going to have to actually start writing doctors’ notes again.”
We’re Poisoning Future Generations!
If the EPA thinks you only have X old fuel storage tanks, but you really have X+2, and the unaccounted for ones are leaking into the soil, is it good enough to just stop measuring the level and shred the documents that prove you know about it?
The Secret Service Don’t Like Us!
That’s all I’ll say for now.
We Forgot To Turn on Someone’s Electricity in the Heat of Summer!
But that’s not what it says on the coroner’s report.
We’re Withholding Information in a Criminal Investigation!
Oh, that thing that person was arrested for? That we knew about? They’ve done it multiple times. But we’re not going to tell you that because hey—we’re too busy building fortresses behind office furniture.
I’m working on a first sentence for my upcoming memoir about this place. I think it will go something like this: “If I told you this was a true story, no one would be willing to publish it, so I’m not going to say any of this happened… but it totally did.”
What is one thing YOU wish you could talk about, but are afraid to? Do you know any dark secrets about your employers? What’s the first thing you would do if you got fired?
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