Everyone told me my wedding day would go by too quickly to remember. Thankfully that wasn’t true, despite the many many glasses of champagne my friend Sars repeatedly poured for me. I feel like I remember everything, including the words we repeated after our hipster pastor.
Despite having way too much to say about everything, I had zero interest in writing and reciting my own vows in front of all those people. Nope. No way, no how. Even still, we managed to sneak in the most sacred of all vows—and I’m not sure anyone really noticed.
When I was ordering our wedding programs they asked whether I wanted to include a thank you message, tribute, or Bible verse on the back. For the most part I felt like my entire wedding was rather well behaved—I wore a white dress, it was in a gorgeous church, and we had a traditional cake. This seemed like an opportunity for subtle subversion, weirdness, and bad behavior.
Basically my three most favorite things in the entire world.
Before making the decision, I consulted Facebook—like I do with all moral choices. No one seemed to discourage me, so I went with it.
Then the wedding day came and I sort of forgot about it until my friend Peeves came roaring into the dressing room.
“NO YOU DID NOT!”
She was clutching the program.
Oh yes, yes I did.
I’m not sure why I love this song so much, but I take a video of myself singing it every single time it comes on the radio. And then I send it to Peeves. In the olden days before camera phones I’d just leave her an old fashioned voicemail. Before Alex came along, she was the luckiest person on Earth.
Our wedding night went exactly the way I’d always dreamed:
- Hasty visit to a rooftop bar at the hotel where a bunch of strangers bought us drinks.
- Consummation, complete with finding dried lavender (that was tossed as we left) in all my crevices.
- Singing Toto’s “Africa” to the man of my dreams. And filming it. Because obviously you guys deserve to be in our wedding bed with us. Also I was a little drunk.
That song will be the anthem of our life together—because I’m pretty sure it doesn’t make sense, and neither does life most of the time, so it’s perfect.
We left for our honeymoon the next afternoon. Before we could almost be eaten by crocodiles, we had to survive a flight—which Alex is not a fan of. I plugged my headphones into the in-flight entertainment jack and stuck one earbud in each of our ears. Music began playing, and… I shit you not:
In that moment I knew the plane wouldn’t crash. Obviously the universe loves us and wants us to “take some time to do the things we never had.”
I wasn’t entirely sure this whole phenom would translate well on a blog—but then I sat down at a busy coffee shop to try and write and, once again, I shit you not:
If that’s not a sign from the universe, I don’t know what is.
Do you have any weird inside jokes or traditions? Have you ever snuck something into a place where it didn’t belong? What’s the anthem or theme song for your life?
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