Sorry everyone. I disappeared like a non-custodial parent when child support becomes due. A combination of factors are to blame:
1. The end of the world as we know it
When something like Donald Trump happens, you feel like you should say something. But then it’s like everyone else is saying things and I’m too busy clicking links about how we are heading toward nuclear war/melting the planet/apartheid and then at the same time I know plenty of people who’ve read and shared my stuff for years probably voted for Trump and I don’t want a repeat of Thanksgiving where somehow I ended up crying in a hotel room and driving back home only a few hours after we’d arrived. So here’s all I will say on the matter:
2. I’m kind of unstoppable
I’ve been super busy writing a book. Which sounds exciting! I did it, you guys! A 130K word first draft filled with the most horrifying clichés and redundant word usage you can imagine. But it still felt like an accomplishment and I would have celebrated if it weren’t for the fact I penned the last 3k words while horribly hungover after doing a Zombie Crawl with Science of Parenthood’s Jessica:
Now I will spend the next eight months or so trying to make it less terrible. Fingers crossed. Sign up here if I can live in your basement when Alex gets sick of me.
3. Baby it’s cold outside
So I’m hibernating. Remember last year’s amazing fashion choices and snow art? I’m back at it, which is to say I got in bed at 6PM last night yet was still awake at midnight because there are videos on YouTube of people in Kazakhstan hunting wolves with eagles
I’ll do my best to muster and stop letting you down. I know your fear of abandonment is as strong as my fear of having to make a phone call when the “click here to order online” button isn’t working. But just in case, you can always find me on facebook-– add me or follow if you don’t want me creeping back atcha. Even when I forget I have a blog, I never forget I have a facebook because it’s the first place I go to share my bliss and also seek important life advice:
That’s all I’ve got for you now. I’m glad we got through this awkward reunion. I’ll just be over here listening to my power song on repeat and pretending like I knew how to spell “Kazakhstan” without googling it first.
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